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I Just Need to Put This Somewhere

Going through tough times, need some support we are here :)

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ColeWayne
Posts: 171
Joined: Fri Apr 07, 2017 4:59 pm

Tue May 12, 2020 10:06 pm

I am feeling down and need a hug, but this is equal parts depressing and uplifting, so take that as you will.

I've worked for my current employer for a number of years. Before I worked for this company, I left my previous company because I was being treated poorly and nothing I tried made it better.

I'm also treated poorly at my current company. The difference being it was more systematic and insidious. It started with my immediate boss (bullying, demeaning, and berating me), but I had a very kind supervisor who intervened a lot. This made things bearable for a few years until he left our department. Then my boss's behavior got much worse. I voiced some concern to his boss, but all he did was tell my direct boss, who then punished me for weeks over it. Next I went to my boss's boss's boss... who then told both of those guys, which led to reprimands from both my boss and his boss - and a number of punishment assignments. One included being sent to deal with another employee who very nearly physically assaulted me until several men nearby intervened.

I found out over the years through conversations that all the people who held my position previously complained to HR, and then mysteriously disappeared from the workplace "to pursue other opportunities." This made me fearful to go to HR and I had started looking for other employment, talking to my doctor, and talking to an ombudsperson.

Things have now escalated visibly due to things being put in writing or said in Zoom meetings that would normally be said in private. We also have some new people in powerful positions who weren't here before. One of these people finally listened to me and is pursuing this. In telling other people from work this is happening I've discovered so many people reaching out to support me that I never knew I could reach out to. It's such an unpleasant, uncomfortable situation, and it is scary. But I'm so encouraged and comforted by this support I'm getting from others. I'm glad I'm seeing this side of some people I may never have seen otherwise.
"Passion. It lies in all of us. And though unwanted, unbidden, it will stir, open its jaws, and howl."

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Storm
Posts: 415
Joined: Thu Jun 20, 2019 10:08 pm

Fri May 15, 2020 4:43 pm

I'm happy you are getting supported now with some at work, being those kind of work conditions you described does indeed make it rough and stressful. It's good you voiced yourself to help stop that kind of bullying done by boss. It's not easy to do that but you did so maybe some who work there too will step up as some don't out of fear they will be targeted and get heat from doing so. Let's hope some changes will be made soon and a more favorable energy flows.

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Mongki
ABT Team
Posts: 176
Joined: Thu Jul 06, 2017 5:57 pm

Sat May 16, 2020 7:30 pm

Auuwww Cole, first of all, a SUPER BIG hug from me!!! I'm so sorry that you had to deal with that! Hope things will get better!
"We are just an advanced breed of 🐵 monkeys 🐵 on a minor planet of a very average star. But we can hope to understand the Universe. That makes us something very special."

💗🐒 💗

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ColeWayne
Posts: 171
Joined: Fri Apr 07, 2017 4:59 pm

Mon Jun 01, 2020 1:55 am

Thank you! Things are ongoing currently.
"Passion. It lies in all of us. And though unwanted, unbidden, it will stir, open its jaws, and howl."

Sanford_P
Posts: 38
Joined: Tue Jun 11, 2019 5:39 pm

Tue Jun 02, 2020 8:25 pm

I hate to say it, Cole, but I think you are screwed. You did not say, but I get the idea you have a technical job, something to do with computers, although any science or engineering discipline would apply. It is a bizarre world we live in when Human Resources covers for supervisors rather than advocates for employees. HR used to be about "attracting and retaining the best employees." No more. Now a prime function of HR is to help supervisors fire employees and keep the company out of lawsuits. The ground level employee has no support, no advocate anywhere in the company.

Do you believe this? Ask yourself this: If your boss shits on you tomorrow, where do you turn? If I sound cynical, it's because this very thing happened to me. I am a chemist who used to work for a chemical manufacturing firm. My supervisor's office was a revolving door where management brought in promising young Ph.D.'s to give them some management experience before assigning them to a position of real responsibility. My last boss did not like me, and he spent two years destroying my career. He had the full support of management and HR. I had no allies. Of course he won. If you are a computer techie, then you know that 75,000 (mostly) IT people are brought in from foreign countries (mostly India) to take jobs because "there are no qualified Americans." I knew a Dutch national chemical engineer who came over on an H1-B visa to work in an ethanol plant- no American chemical engineers up to the task apparently.

I know my story is not going to brighten your day. Perhaps it is enough to know you are not alone. There are many more like you, and me. I can offer you a reading if you like.

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ColeWayne
Posts: 171
Joined: Fri Apr 07, 2017 4:59 pm

Tue Jun 09, 2020 11:58 pm

Hi Sanford. How I fare remains to be seen. I've done all I can and it's now in someone else's hands and I have to see how it plays out. Thank you for your support!
"Passion. It lies in all of us. And though unwanted, unbidden, it will stir, open its jaws, and howl."

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